For the Parents: Just A Reminder...

Wade works quite a few nights. I try to be awake when he gets home so we can spend quality time as a family. This gives him time to unwind, relax, and sometimes unload. Last night the three of us spent the night like we normally do: me holding Harper while he fixes something to eat, him playing with her while I get things ready for bed. Well, last night, she was getting a wee bit fussy so I tried nursing her. She acted disinterested so I told Wade she needed her diaper changed, handed her off to him, and he went upstairs. I started to upload some pictures from my camera when I heard her SCREAMING. It seriously sounded like someone was hurting her. I gave him a few minutes (seconds?) before I went up to see what was wrong. He was calmer than I thought he'd be, but she was just laying there crying and crying and crying. All the while I'm resisting the temptation to just PICK MY BABY UP cause he's the dad, you know. But finally he finishes with her, I take her back downstairs and try nursing her again. And guess what? That's all she wanted. The moral of this story: DON'T TAKE THE BOOB AWAY.

::You'd never know it to look at her, but this sweet little girl has got some LUNGS::

A friend of our family's, who is graduating high school this weekend, visited my parent's house last week. M., my mom, and I were sitting in the living room talking about nothing and everything. Then M tells us about a freshman (FRESHMAN!) who is pregnant. Aren't FRESHMEN like 14 years-old?!? I'm pretty sure my friends and I were not having sex or even THINKING about having sex at 14. YIKES.

I look at Harper and while I try to slow down my days, make every moment with her stretch as much as possible, I still think about the future. What will she be like? What sort of things will she be interested in? Will she and I be good friends like my mom and me are? Will I be able to educate her about the right things? Will we be able to instill the right morals and values in her. Will we be able to keep our 14 (16, 18!) year-old from getting pregnant? I know things like this happen more often than we like to think. And if it's going to happen, it will. I hope that I can keep it from happening; I hope that Harper is smarter and in more control over her body than that.

Can't she just be a nerd? And want to read books? And learn everything about everything? And be beautiful? And independent? And have great social skills?

But most of all, can't she just be a nerd and neverevernever want to have sex at 14 (or 16 or 18!).

I don't care if she wants to be a nerd who runs around in a cape all day. I will still love her. (And I would love her if she got pregnant at 14 GOD FORBID.)

A Different Kind of Night

Getting Harper to go to sleep has been a bit of a challenge. So is keeping her asleep. She fights it with every fiber of her being. According to my mom, I was the exact same way. Guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Harper has been staying awake for longer periods of time which is truly wonderful. During these times she's alert, smiling, cooing, and always observing. This child LOVES to be outside. When the rocking/bouncing doesn't soothe her enough to get her to sleep, going outside usually will. Thank goodness it's fairly warm out! So, after nursing her around 6:30 or 7:00 last night, I got her all bundled up (so much for warm weather today!)...
Mom and I walked longer than normal just to make sure Harper was asleep. And she was for about 45 minutes. Then she was WIDE awake. But last night there was no crying. no wailing. no screams. She was a "normal" baby last night. She stayed up with Wade and I from about 8:30-10 just hanging out. Around ten, she got a little fussy, but cuddled up on me and passed out. UNTIL 9:30 this morning! She only woke up to nurse at 2:30 and then again at 7:30. Unbelievable! I was so impressed and so excited that my baby is finally learning how to calm down. How to just relax and enjoy everything. And when she woke up this morning she was FULL of smiles. If she keeps that up, I don't know how I'll stop my heart from bursting. Seriously.


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What Could Be Better...

...than having this sweet baby girl give you THIS big grin????


Oh. That's right........NOTHING.

7 Weeks

Sweet Baby Harper,
Today starts your seventh week in this world and in our lives. These truly have been the best weeks of my life. What was my life like before you? I can't remember!

We have had a very sweet, quiet day celebrating this milestone - staying in bed sleeping until 11:00 (thank you for that, by the way!), a nap for you while momma cleaned, banked, and we got some groceries (you slept the entire time!), and when we got home we had an impromptu dance session while we put away the food. You have since fallen quietly asleep in my arms, smiling up a storm (what are you dreaming of, my love, that makes you so happy?). In these moments I don't know how I could possibly love you more. You are the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. I hope you will always know that.

Momma and daddy love you more than we can possibly say!

And now for some cuddling on the couch so I can soak up all of you...xoxoxoxoxo

My Happy Grinch Heart

There's a scene in The Grinch where he hears the Whos singing joyfully even after he's snatched up all their gifts and he realizes what the true spirit of Christmas really is. And at that moment his heart grows so much it breaks the gold measuring tool.

That is how my heart felt last night.

After a busy day of getting a bath, lunch with Gramie, and a visit to Aunt D's, Harper was pretty spent. We napped together in the afternoon, visited the grandparents next door where we took a walk and she quickly fell asleep (this little girl LOVES her some nature. It's ridiculously sweet). We got back to our home around 10:30 and I put her in her swing to help her sleep some more. She lasted about 5 minutes in there and I thought to myself, Oh no it's going to be a long night! I picked her up, cradled her on my lap in my arms so she looked like a Buddha Baby and, believe it or not, she was perfectly content. I knew I was pressing my luck, but after a few minutes of sitting like this I decided to lay down on the couch with her on my chest. Slowly I slid down and I started giving her a little baby massage on her back. And she went out like a light. I couldn't believe it! No fuss. No cries. No wimpers.

And my heart grew in that moment.

These are the quiet, sweet memories I hope to cherish forever.This sweet baby girl has stolen my heart.

Catching Up

Six weeks have passed since I gave birth to Harper. These have been THE.BEST. weeks of my life. This whole mommy thing? Yea, I was meant to do this! This is the greatest and most rewarding job I could ever hope to have. This is little baby girl has changed me and my life in so many wonderful and interesting ways. My heart has grown tremendously. It's so true that you never knew you could love someone so much. I thought that I could never love someone as much as I love Wade and I still love him an awful lot, but this is completely different and all-encompassing. I could sit holding and staring at her all day and NEVER get bored. The hours fly by now as it is.
Granted, these past weeks haven't been all butterflies and unicorns. There has been a whole lot of adjustment. She's been having colic episodes at night - usually between 8 and 11 pm. There's not much else to console her besides swaddling, rocking, bouncing, and occasionally her pacifier. She gets frequent belly aches so there are the random crying fits during the day, but those don't last as long. Other than that, she's a very happy baby. She's starting to smile and coo which just completely melts my heart.
Breastfeeding has gone wonderfully. The only problems I've encountered are occasional engorgement and twice she has completely drained me (and was still hungry!) Harper is a complete natural when it comes to latching on. She has been since Day 1, which I am grateful for. I had heard and read so many horror stories when I was pregnant that I was pretty scared out of my mind. But we're still going strong (and exclusively!) after 6 weeks. My goal is six months, but my dream is to make it to a year. Nursing times are some of my favorite times.
Harper did have to spend a week in the NICU after she was born. I delievered her so quickly (about a half hour of pushing - I was in labor in the hospital for 5 hours) that she took a big gulp on the way out and developed pneumonia. The second and third pictures are of her while she was in there.