7 Months

My Sweet Baby Harper,
    Last Friday you turned 7 months.  Instead of feeling sad and wondering how in the world these past 7 months have flown by so quickly, I felt elated.  This past month has really brought out your personality.  You're moving more than ever, babbling more than ever, and you are almost always happy.

The day you turned 7 months. Love the sweater!

You are starting to crawl, though only a little bit at a time.  Mostly you maneuver yourself around until you can pull yourself up on a piece of furniture (ever heard of a heart attack?!).  What you really want to do is walk.  You're happiest when someone is walking you around.  I can now put you in the pack n' play where you hold onto the sides and stand for extended periods of time.  You babble and coo and chew on the sides.  And this makes you ridiculously happy.  You will now sit and play by yourself.  Granted, this doesn't last for very long, maybe 5 or 10 minutes at a time, but I can eat or go to the bathroom during these times.  I'm enjoying it now because soon I won't be able to leave you alone.
You are in the process of getting your top four front teeth (eek!).  So far, so good, though I feel so sorry for you.  Mouth pain is the worst! You've been good during nursing by sparing Momma's nipples and I thank you!

Everyday you change.  Everyday I love you more.  What I really wanted to tell you was just how much I love you and hope for you.  I know I will make mistakes and I will piss you off and we won't always agree on everything.  I get that.  But I have been thinking a lot about being a mom, both now and in the future, and I really, truly hope that I can help you grow into a well-rounded, healthy (both body and mind), mature, happy adult.  I have moments where I freeze up at the thought of helping you grow up in this world.  Will I be able to equip you with the tools you will need to be successful, but also with the tools necessary to pick yourself back up when you fail?  Will I be able to show you the world, both good and bad, and prepare you for it?  Will the knowledge that I have be enough for you?  Will I be able to impart to you the values and morals that were instilled in me?  How can I protect you from all the ills of the world, but let you know enough of it so that you don't go down some life-damaging path?  What I mean to say, my love, is that I worry for and about you.  CONSTANTLY.  And you're only SEVEN MONTHS OLD.  (Imagine how the next 20 or 40 years will be!)  I worry now about the arguments we will have later and whether or not we will have the beautiful relationship that my mother and I have.  You will make mistakes.  You will fail at times.  You will learn the ugly truth about the world and people.  I can't hide you from the bad, as much as I would like to shove you into that plastic bubble.  I know that's not even plausible because you need to be aware in order to persevere.  And while these things I worry about are in the future, they're very close on my mind.  I love you my little one more than anything.  I hope that you will always know that.  I hope that I forever continue to show you the love that I feel right now.  Keep blossoming my love!  I'll be right here to watch every minute and to cheer you on!